Foster2Forever

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It’s a Fabulous Day!

Woo Hoo!  Not only is May National Foster Care Awareness Month, but today, I am the Featured Blogger on The SITS Girls!!! A fabulous group of women bloggers supporting one another through social media. In fact, I wrote an article for them in January about how to help children in foster care that was very well received.

Blogging tipsI’ve learned a lot about the art of blogging through their website. And two years ago, I attended the SITS Girls Bloggy Boot Camp in Austin.  I was so overwhelmed with all there is to learn and do in the wild world of blogging. Who knew?  I will be meeting up with the SITS Girls again at Bloggy Boot Camp Dallas in September!

If you are here from SITS, HOWDY!!!

I’m Penelope, a foster mom that beat infertility by adopting two gorgeous baby boys from foster care. On this blog, I share my rollercoaster adventures of foster care and parenting once-neglected children.

Parenting is a challenge in of itself; however, add to that early neglect and trauma, and parenting can sometimes become overwhelming!

I’ve shared about my struggle to parent a difficult child, and tried a number of parenting techniques and strategies, such as:

But as much as a struggle parenting can be at times, I am overjoyed with my children! I am so proud to call my strong-willed Stinkpot my son.  When he out-of-the-blue says “I love you” or “kissy kissy my mommy“, I can hardly contain my joy. Those are the small moments that take my breath away.

And we are extremely blessed to call our illegal immigrant, Lil Bit, our son.  Sign up to receive our ebook that tells our unbelievable true story of his quasi-international adoption through foster care. God performed many miracles, including this one, to keep him home with us!

In celebration of National Foster Care Awareness Month, I am adding a community for Forever Families right here on my blog!  Also, feel free to contact me on Twitter (@Foster2Forever) and on Facebook.

Come introduce yourself in my community below!

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Love From a Birthmother

I’ve begun receiving hate mail. Yes, it’s true. In my naivety, I didn’t think that raising abused and neglected children would be something anyone could hate. However, a community of birthmothers, angry at the foster care system, have attempted on numerous occasions to lash out at me and other foster parents for our role in the system. Although sometimes shocked by their harsh words, I do realize that they are hurting. I pray for healing for these birthfamilies.

However, not all birthfamilies despise foster families.

Some birthfamilies are grateful for the care foster parents give their children. I recently received this comment from a birthmother:

I would like to know how to let my kids’ foster family know how much they mean to me and that they will always be family to me and my kids. They have been with them for 2 years and they are now coming home. These people have been wonderful to me, my kids and my new baby.  Without them, none of this (reunification) would be able to happen.

I was really close with them until we got the news the kids would be coming home . I am sure they are crushed. I just want them to know they will always be Mama H and Daddy S to the kids as well as their kids’ brother and sister.

Can anyone tell me the best way to go about this please?

My reply was: “a simple card with a letter stating how you feel should help them through the healing process.”

What are your thoughts?  How can a birthmother show love and appreciation to foster parents?

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Hugs & Kisses at IHeartFaces.com - Click for free PhotoShop action

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What’s Your Story? Contributors Wanted

Isn’t it amazing how God sometimes just puts everything together? Without you even being aware. And then, BAM! – when realizing, “Oh, that’s what He was doing!”

I’ve begun compiling the story of our crazy adoption of Lil Bit. With all its twists and turns. (with tons of editing necessary)

We will be releasing our story as an e-book later this month – free to email subscribers. (Are you a subscriber?)

And would you believe it? Amazingly, a writing course just fell into place. The timing is impeccable!  With a Children’s Bible Study for the kids. Wow!

Our readers' #1 bestseller! Have you read this childrens' book on foster care?

This writing course has had several published authors speak.

Each speaker has their own unique gift of storytelling. But each speaker, at one point, has said:

“We all have a story. A story that can touch lives. Each story is unique. Each story should be heard.“

And as foster parents, our stories are unique. Our stories can touch lives because our lives as foster parents touch young lives, if just for a brief time.

 

What is your story?

We’d like to read it here!

I love the community of foster parents here online. It’s made me feel less alone in this unique situation of foster parenting.

Would you like to become a contributer at Foster2Forever so you can tell your story? 

We’re looking for bloggers/writers/advocates/individuals to tell their stories here just once a month.  Just submit the contact form and tell us a little bit about your story.

What is your story?

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Top Posts of 2011 – Year In Review

2011 was a huge year for our growing family!  After nearly 2 years of having our Lil Bit as part of our family, we finally became his forever family officially.  We had many roadblocks during this journey to adoption!

Our website, Foster2Forever, has grown too. In February, we moved from Blogger to a dot com and had a little over 500 visitors in March.  However, since April, we’ve had around 2,000 visitors each month!!!

I’m simply astounded!

Thanks to Google Analytics, here are the most viewed posts of each month through 2011!

January: Do I Really Want to Look Like Angelina Jolie?

An allergic reaction to the flu shot caused my lips to swell as huge as the mother of Brad Pitt’s 6 children. After refusing to take another flu shot, I then, surprisingly, caught the flu.

February:  Am I Harboring an Illegal Immigrant?

I explain our Lil Bit’s immigration status and how it might delay our eventual adoption.

March:  Our Foster Baby is Officially an Orphan

It took 15 months to terminate the parental rights of both foster parents, given the birth father was somewhere in Mexico.

April:  No Time-Out?

Struggling with disciplining our Stinkpot, I discovered time-out wasn’t effective, and did just the opposite, with surprising results.

May: Open Adoption – Writing to the Birth Family

Our adoption agreement with Lil Bit’s birth mother stipulates an annual update letter.  Here I ponder whether to include the distressing events in Lil Bit’s time with us.

June:  Top 3 Ways to Delay Getting a Foster Care License

How our journey to become licensed for foster care was delayed over and over.

July:  Our Foster Baby Broke His Arm!

Our 22-month-old little climber fell and broke his arm on July 4th. This in turn triggered an investigation into our foster home, further delaying our eventual adoption.

August:  What Are Legal Risk Placements in Foster Care?

10 Frequently Asked Questions on legal risk placements.

September: We Are FINALLY Adopting our Foster Boy!

This post outlined our 21-month journey to become Lil Bit’s forever family. However, this was written just 10 days before our Lil Bit broke the same arm AGAIN, prompting yet ANOTHER investigation into our foster home.  It was beginning to look like we might never adopt this kid!

October: When You Shouldn’t Adopt from Foster Care

Renowned adoption advocate, Russell Moore, actually encourages some Christians to not adopt a child, just get a cat!

November:  Introducing Our New Son

After 23 months of hiding our Lil Bit’s angelic face from the world, I am officially a proud mama that can finally show off her adorable baby boy (and those amazing eyelashes)!

December:  New Home for Lil Bit’s Baby Brother

Two days before Lil Bit’s adoption, we receive a call that he has a newborn brother that is being released from the hospital. We sadly didn’t take the placement. Here’s what became of this newborn baby.

BONUS:

Foster2Forever had some incredible guest posts this year!  Two of these posts had over 500 pageviews each!

 

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Disease Takes No Holidays! RSV Strikes Again!

A belated Merry Christmas to you!  We hope your holiday was merrier than ours.  It had to be…

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Our Lil Bit had RSV this weekend & didn't feel well. I entered this photo in the IHeartFaces holiday challenge.

For those of you who don’t follow Foster2Forever on Facebook or Twitter…

Our 2-year-old, Lil Bit, is in day care – a breeding ground for illness.  On Friday, I noticed that, although happy to be playing at home with his family, he was coughing quite a bit.  It wasn’t until late afternoon that I realized — he had a fever!  A low-grade fever of less than 100 degrees F (For my Aussie readers that’s about 37.7 C). But I knew I had to get him to a doctor FAST!

I glanced at the clock. It’s 5:02 p.m.

“Dog gone it!!!“

I called the doctor’s office anyway.

“Our office hours are 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. Monday through Friday. If this is an emergency, call 9-1-1.”

We were praying he didn’t get worse. Ibuprofen controlled the fever through most of the night; however, in the morning, he still had the fever and was coughing incessantly.

We were praying we wouldn’t be spending Christmas Eve in the Emergency Room.

I called our family medical clinic that has Saturday hours. Maybe, just maybe, they will be open on Christmas Eve.

“Good morning, how may I help you?”

Hallelujah! Our family physician was the doctor on duty this Christmas Eve morning.

Dr. Meyer diagnosed our Lil Bit with RSV, prescribed a steroid, prayed for him, and sent us HOME.  We are blessed!

What is RSV?

RSV stands for Respiratory Syncytial Virus.  In adults and older children, it’s basically a cold; however, in infants, it is a very serious virus that usually requires hospitalization.  The virus causes an overabundance of mucus, which adults and older children can cough up; however, for an infant, it can cause respiratory problems and low oxygen levels.  You can read more details about what is RSV and its symptoms at Christian Mama’s Guide.

Our History with RSV

We are not strangers to this virus. This is Lil Bit’s third bout with RSV:

  1. Our Lil Bit was only 5 months old when he was first hospitalized for RSV.  During this hospital stay, we were given the paperwork for Lil Bit’s removal from our home and placement with a distant relative.  My heart wept as I was saying my goodbyes for this little angel struggling to breathe.  This is when we made that life-changing decision to intervene in the familial placement and fight for custody.
  2. One year later in February of this year, at 17 months old, our Lil Bit was diagnosed with a common cold on a Friday, and then by Monday, was hospitalized for RSV that had developed into pneumonia.  (Lesson: Doctors can misdiagnose RSV with serious consequences)
  3. At 2-1/2 years old, our Lil Bit still struggled through RSV; however, we are thankful that his breathing wasn’t affected, and that we didn’t have to celebrate our Christmas in the hospital. Thank you, Lord, for your blessings!

And if Lil Bit contracting RSV isn’t bad enough – Now, Stinkpot has a horrible cough, runny nose and fever.  And I’m getting a course cough and tightness in my chest…OUCH!

Happy New Year, Everyone!

Have any of your little ones had RSV?

IHeartFaces.com

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Connecting on the Internet

Extreme Makeover

As you can see, Foster2Forever had a makeover.  New logo and new look for the site. (Also a new wordpress theme that I will have to learn.)  The navigation menu now has a drop-down menu so you can find topics easier. I’m still trying to figure out the header…

Also, social media buttons include Foster2Forever’s Twitter (do you tweet?) and Foster2Forever’s StumbleUpon which lists blog posts from the blogosphere that I find interesting.  Take a look and some of my discoveries! Are you a Stumbler?

Be honest, what do you think? Too different? Easier to navigate?

Facebook Changes

Yesterday, Facebook changed.  Here are some of the photos that have been scrolling down my Facebook wall.

Even Twitter had the hashtag #newfacebook trending all day. What Facebook did was take apart the News Feed and put your “Top Stories” at the top of the feed and friend’s activities to the top right.  Those items were there, but just buried in the news feed.  So I guess I am in the minority in saying that the change hasn’t really affected me much.  Are you upset about the Facebook changes?

Foster2Forever Facebook Page

Yesterday, I posted this photo on Foster2Forever’s Facebook page and asked y’all to guess what it was a photo of.

The surgical pins keeping our Lil Bit's elbow together. Yuk!

I didn’t realize that those things stick out like that! No wonder the doctor said he could take those out at the office.  Ew! Our LilBit will have those things in for at least another 2 weeks and will be wearing a cast for another month after that. Are you one of our friends on Foster2Forever’s Facebook page? After this photo, are you regretting it?  Sorry if you are grossed out! As a Biologist, I was curious…

Wanted: Information on Foster Care License

Foster2Forever is compiling a list of websites that discuss the process to become a licensed foster home. We will post the list on September 29th. We currently have 5 posts ready to publish. Is yours on the list?

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When Disaster Strikes – What Can We Do?

As I was traveling home on Labor Day Monday, I inadvertently came across a fire. A wildfire! The grass was burned, yet still smoldering. And then I saw it – a tree actively on fire! And soon afterward, emergency vehicles whizzed by.

I had no idea of the magnitude of the devastation I partially witnessed.

photo courtesy of Carol Miller from texas-fire.com

The Bastrop fire could be seen from Austin.

photo courtesy wildfiretoday.com

The wildfires are all over the state of Texas.

These wildfires are so enormous that they can be seen from space.

At last count, 1,386 homes have been destroyed in Bastrop alone.

People have lost everything. Some were given 15 minutes to grab their belongings and go!

I would grab my kids, photos, computer hard drives, and whatever clothes, diapers and toiletries I could grab.

These disaster victims are currently living in shelters set up at the Bastrop Middle School and Smithville Recreation Center.

Could you donate directly to the American Red Cross of Central Texas?

Will you donate or simply pray for these newly homeless souls?

What possessions would you grab if given only 15 minutes?

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WANTED: Information on Foster Care License

Happy Labor Day!

We hope that you are enjoying your “last weekend of summer”.  Here in Texas, we are finally getting cooler temperatures.  Cooler actually is less than 100 degrees.

Last night, I actually sat on the front porch, enjoying the breeze, and began reading a wonderfully written best-selling novel about a couple’s journey through infertility and adoption. On September 22nd, I am joining the SITS Girls Book Club and the author for an online discussion. Will you join me???

Now, onto this month’s Foster Focus on getting a foster care license.

A few months ago, I detailed our journey to become a licensed foster home that included travel to 3 towns and over 1,800 miles of driving.

During that 4 post series, there were a lot of comments discussing the similarities and differences on becoming a licensed foster home.  State vs. Private agency, PRIDE vs. MAPP, etc.

This month, Foster2Forever would like to compile all those different requirements into a large list post to share on Thursday, September 29th as a resource for all of our foster care readers everywhere. (maybe in a blog hop format for everyone to share on their blogs?)

Have you already written about your licensing journey? Then share the link below in the comments!

If not, get writing! Then, send the link to your blog post through our CONTACT page.

If you wrote a series of posts, as I did, then you can send the link to the first post and link it to subsequent posts, OR write a post listing each of the posts.

If you feel comfortable, please share what state (or country) you are in and whether you are licensed through the State or through a private agency.

I am so excited!!!  Will you join in???

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Little Love Tokens

Little Love Tokens Aren’t these fabulous?

Adoption Pendant NecklaceAdoption Pendant Necklace
Kristy, tell us about yourself.
I am a fun-loving mom of two sweet, feisty, precious boys – Charlie who is 7 and Jackson who is 10 – and a hound dog and a scottie dog. We live in College Station, TX and love the Aggies. I have always been a creative, entrepreneurial type of girl who is full of ideas…some good and some bad. I love to travel, but I a have run out of money and time right now. I think the best way to ruin your day is to plan it. You may not accomplish much, but you will learn a lot.
How did you start your jewelry business?
I started my jewelry business on a whim. I have always liked rustic, artisan style silver jewelry and became interested in making it. After researching it, I bought some supplies online and went to work. The first pendant I produced was a K wax seal initial pendant and I wear it everyday. I love that my Little Love Tokens are reflective of who we are: imperfect yet charming.
You donate a portion of the proceeds to the Adoption Foundation of Tennessee. What lead you to that cause?
What prompted me to make my adoption piece was that I have a friend in Tennessee who runs the Adoption Foundation of Tennessee and she saw my necklaces on Facebook and asked if I would design a piece for her organization. I jumped at the idea. I feel so blessed to be able to help families adopt precious children. It breaks my heart that so many wonderful families can’t adopt because of the costs involved. It is an honor to be able to help with this endeavor.

I’m Clever

Sway