Foster2Forever

Archives for November 2011

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4 Surprising Gifts You Can’t Give Your Foster Kids

It’s Cyber Monday! That means great shopping deals!  The Children’s Place is having 30% site-wide with free shipping. And at my favorite store The Body Shop, you can buy 3 items for $30 with free shipping!

However, foster parents have to be careful when buying gifts for children in foster care.  Depending on the rules where you live, there maybe some items that are surprisingly “outlawed” by regulations.

4. Accordion Safety Gates


Not that this is really a gift, per se, but it is definitely on the “naughty list” if you live in Texas and have infants in foster care. (40 TAC 749.1813)

3. Baby Walkers


Again for homes with infants, foster parents in Texas cannot use the old-fashioned mobile baby walkers for infants. (40 TAC 749.1813)

“Baby walkers present a hazard due to risk of falls down stairs, steps, and tipping over thresholds or carpet edges. They provide infants accessibility to potentially hot surfaces, containers of hot liquids such as coffee, dangling appliance cords, poisonous plants or hazardous substances and buckets, toilets or other containers of water.”

Can’t this happen when little ones start walking?  Use stationary items, such as an activity center instead.

2. Baby Bungee Jumpers

“Baby bungee jumpers present a hazard due to increased risk of injury to the child as a result of spinning, swinging, or bumping into walls.” (40 TAC 749.1813)

It’s pretty obvious that other kids in foster homes were swinging babies into walls, causing them injuries.

1. Trampolines

And the #1 surprising gift you can’t give a foster child is a trampoline.

“Trampolines may not be used as play or recreational equipment.” (40 TAC 749.3039)

It’s too bad since jumping is a great way for kids to expel some of that ADHD energy. And sleep better at night!


So how about a bounce house?  I’ve seen these numerous times at State-sponsored foster care events with children in foster care jumping their way to the stars!!!

What gifts are on the “naughty list” where you live?

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Introducing Our New Son

On December 15, 2009, I received a call that changed our lives. Mostly, it changed the life of this infant boy, only 3 months old at the time.

I fell in love at first sight. A first for me as I didn’t believe in love at first sight before that day.

Our Lil Bit is beautifully and wonderfully made!

Our Lil Bit scared us so many times. Numerous hospital stays and TWO broken arms!

Lil Bit loves his brother, Stinkpot, and asks for him first thing everyday! I love watching their relationship grow.

As our Lil Bit grows up, his smile warms my heart every step of the way!

23 months and 3 days later, he is our son!!! We are now officially a FAMILY!

Thank you for your support over the last two years. Every comment you have made, has made our journey easier.

May God shower you with His beautiful blessings as he has our family!

Much love and hugs!

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Our Lil Bit Has a Newborn Baby Brother!

In foster care, one phone call can instantly change lives. If you follow Foster2Forever on Facebook and Twitter, you already know that we received that call yesterday.

We are so excited to be adopting Lil Bit tomorrow and are busy preparing for the big day. I was blindsided yesterday morning when I received a call from our caseworker.

“Lil Bit’s birthmom gave birth to a healthy, full-term baby boy that will be released from the hospital tomorrow. The State is giving you the first option for placement.”

WHOA!!! Gulp! A day before Lil Bit’s adoption! A newborn! Another boy! Another probable adoption! Wow! Overwhelming! A decision that can change a life to be made quickly!

I called FosterDad. His assistant answered. He was in a meeting.

“I need FosterDad to call me immediately!”

She was concerned at the tone of my voice. I assured her that everything was fine, and told her about the call. We both laughed and agreed that FosterDad was going to freak out.  She assured me that he would be sitting down when he called back, and I asked her to record his reaction.

His reaction was disbelief and just flat-out overwhelming shock.  I could hear his assistant cackling in the background.

We had a huge decision to make. I reached out to our Facebook friends – you are the best!  I was struggling until I read what Shawn wrote:

“Look back to your post on Nov 10th at 11:43 am.”

That post was related to our situation with Stinkpot’s care and read:

When feeling down and confused, blessings from above can make you soar above the clouds! Thank you, Lord, for your unexpected blessings!

I cried realizing that this baby was an unexpected blessing, and there was a reason for this call.  Thank you, Shawn!

THEN I RECEIVED ANOTHER PLACEMENT CALL!

A caseworker from Austin called later in the afternoon:

We are calling to inform you that STINKPOT‘s birthmother gave birth to a healthy baby boy, and we would like to place the newborn with you.

YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME! Both my boys become big brothers the same week!  TWO NEWBORNS???  TWO more boys??? Twins!!!

AAAAHHHHHH!!!!! Good thing I was laying down at the time. I AM ONE FREAKED OUT CHICK!

I stammered why I am laughing so uncontrollably.  Fortunately, this seasoned caseworker knew what was going on and promised to call right back.

His instinct was right – the message had gotten mixed up along the way and it was, in fact, Lil Bit’s birthmom that had given birth, not Stinkpot’s.  (I had thought she was in prison.)

A LIFE-CHANGING DECISION

We have a HUGE decision to make! FosterDad felt uneasy about adding the newborn baby to our family given Stinkpot’s current adjustment issues.  I felt uneasy about saying no to this newborn baby when we fought so hard to keep Lil Bit.

I needed to talk to the baby’s caseworker.

She called last night, and I shared our concerns and how much we are struggling with the decision. She understood. Apparently, the State has no other homes lined up for this baby.

My first concern has to be with Stinkpot, and that right now adding a baby may shake up his world  more than he can handle right now at this moment.

I asked to be kept informed of the case.  I feel sick for saying no.

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Ding! Dong! Here’s A Baby! – My Messiest Moments as a Foster Mom

One of the most challenging aspects of foster care is that your life can change at a moment’s notice.  Our lives changed instantly on March 4, 2008, when we received a call for an 8-month-old baby boy.  I was so excited! A baby!!!  (That never happens in foster care.)  It was only after our JD arrived that I realized – “I don’t know nothing about babies!”

I was handed a baby with only a few things.  What does an 8-month-old baby eat? I had no idea! There was some cereal & formula. Hmm! I guess this is what I’m supposed feed him.

Our baby JD was so sick! He was so congested that he barely could breathe. His eyes were matted with mucus. He had a diaper rash the size of his entire diaper!

JD’s sick little eyes when he arrived

Wow! Overwhelming to say the least for our very first placement.

He had a few prescriptions for antibiotics and a nebulizer for breathing treatments.  Because of all his breathing problems as a baby, JD was on and off antibiotics for most of his toddlerhood.  But with the antibiotics came the dreaded diarrhea. Not just “loose” stools but water-y projectile diarrhea!  And did it go away after he would complete a round of antibiotics? NO!

For two years, our JD would have occasional, unexplained brown river diarrhea. And, of course, it would hit at the most random times:

  • We would receive THAT call from the daycare saying: “You need to come pick up JD NOW. He’s had two bouts of diarrhea already today.“
  • While FosterDad was at home alone with diaper-changing duties, JD shot his “liquid weapon” across the room, hitting the crib, carpeting, nursery door, and anything in his way. For this round, JD got bonus points for shooting his brown shrapnel into his diaper bag and even in his shoes!
  • Even our teenager wasn’t immune to being on the receiving end of the mess.  One day as Bubba was keeping JD for a couple of hours, he called me frantic, “JD’s diaper came off during his nap and there’s crap everywhere!”  I gave him some simple instructions as I rushed home.  Bubba wasn’t exaggerating! JD was covered in crap as Bubba had a (as in one) diaper wipe trying to clean him up.
  • On vacation, at the Rainforest Cafe on Galveston Island. FosterDad and Bubba were changing him in the mens room as other restaurant patrons were dodging the brown spray.
  • Numerous other restaurants that we had to make a quick exit.
  • JD was constantly messing his clothes (and ours).

We should’ve bought stock in Clorox Disinfecting Wipes!

However, FINALLY, after 2 years of dodging diarrhea, we discovered the truth behind the turds after our JD began talking.  One afternoon, he asked for a glass of milk, and an hour later began complaining that his tummy hurt!

Our JD was lactose-sensitive!  Imagine that! All that misery that could have been avoided had we known a little more about JD’s medical history.

If I had only known….I could have avoided my messiest moments as a foster mom!!!

What do you wish you would have known about a child in your care?

What has been your messiest moment as a parent?

I received information about Clorox’s Bleach It Away campaign and am sharing my messy moment with The SITS Girls.  Check out www.BleachItAway.com – where you can share your messiest story, plus grab a coupon for Clorox® Regular Bleach.

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Adoption Month Blog Hop – Share Your Adoption Stories

November is National Adoption Month!

foster-care-adoption
Foster2Forever wants to celebrate by sharing adoption stories through a blog hop/carnival for the month of November. You can join in whether you’ve already adopted or even if you’re just beginning your adoption journey.

Write on any topic of adoption that you feel led: your adoption journey, why you adopted, opportunities to help adoptive families, how adoption has changed lives, challenges, etc.

  • Try to keep your post less than 500 words;
  • Add our Foster2Forever badge to your website or just link back here;
  • Grab the blog hop code to add to your site!

Read Other Adoption Stories!

Be sure and visit other adoption stories to give congratulations, provide support, or make new friends!

You can also join in the blog hop at The R House.

Here’s to National Adoption Month!

I’m Clever

Sway