Why We Fought For Our Foster Child

Our foster child, Lil Bit, has a birth family that loves him.  Lil Bit wasn’t abused or neglected.  He had a family member that expressed interest in adopting him that had an approved home study.

Have you seen the movie Losing Isaiah? Click image to view the movie trailer.

So, why in the world would you steal this foster baby from his family?

We have been accused of this.  However, as his foster parents, we felt it was our duty to keep this baby SAFE.

Even if it was unpopular.

Even if the State was against us.

Even if the Court-Appointed Special Advocate (CASA or GAL) was against us.

Even if the foster child’s Ad Litem Attorney was against us.

Even if it cost us thousands of dollars, which it did. (Thank goodness for the adoption tax credit!)

So , why did you go through all the hassle and expense to keep this foster baby?

Again, to keep this baby SAFE.

To back up, Lil Bit was taken away from his birth mother when she got into a physical altercation with her grandmother.

This violence occurred while birth mom was holding 3-month-old Lil Bit in her arms.

The grandmother (Lil Bit’s great-grandmother) threw the first punch at birth mom while she was holding the baby!

If that’s not bad enough, the grandmother pushed birth mom onto the bed and tried to physically take Lil Bit out of her arms!

They were playing tug-of-war with an infant!

After removal, Lil Bit’s great-aunt told the State that she would be willing to adopt him and went through the process of a home study, which their home passed.

So, if the foster baby could go live with a relative – why would you steal this baby from his family?

Simple answer:  There was one sentence in the great-aunt’s home study.  That one sentence made us want to fight to keep this baby and spend whatever it took:

The grandmother (that struck the birth mom) babysits the great-aunt’s kids after school and during the summer!

But the home study didn’t consider this. It should have!

Other factors in our decision included:

  • Prior investigation into the home;
  • Birthmother wanted her child to be raised in OUR family, instead of her own. (The largest reason)

Was the home study sufficient? Would you have fought the foster care system to keep this foster child?

UPDATE: In 2013, a horrific crime occurred against children in this birthfamily. We feel completely at peace with our decision to fight the system and keep our LilBit from becoming another victim of an unspeakable crime!